It's Challenging

I love my job.

I mean, seriously.  I love my job.

I get to laugh- a lot.  I get to cut and laugh and color and laugh and make jokes that no one in the room understands and laugh and pat kids on the back.  I get to laugh and smile my way through the day.

Unless I don't.  I have one period of students who make my blood boil.  I try so hard to greet them warmly each day, and pretend to be so excited that we're going to sing a song I've already sung four times that day.  Almost every day I am animated and happy and I smile at them.  Six or seven minutes in I can feel my blood pressure rising.  They won't stop talking.  They won't listen.  They're disrespectful.  I'm out of ideas. I don't know what to do.  I have no control and they are only eleven.

The worst part is when I have a day like today- I yelled and they yelled back.  After I dismissed the class, one sixth grader screamed at me for a full minute at the top of his lungs.  Then I had to greet another sixth grade class: smiling, happy, excited.  I have to pretend nothing is wrong.  The inability to decompress just compounds my frustration and I need a break.

The good news is that it's only 50 minutes.  The very worst part of my day is only fifty minutes long and then it's over.  The rest of my day is stellar.  But those fifty minutes are so freaking tough.

And when I thought I couldn't take one more day this week I prepared my sub folder, stuffed with worksheets and instructions.  Then three students stayed for tutoring.  And two parents (!!) told me, "I appreciate you."  And the frustration melted away and I gained a little perspective.

And I remembered that tomorrow is another day.  And actually, not just any other day but Friday.


Friday.


Phew.