The Sims- Part One

Sorry, Mario...I am not big into video games.

It seems like every year I play just a few times, and usually I play the same three or four games, which is fine because this schedule enables me to continue doing more productive things (like watching Teen Mom) and saves The Peaches some money.

The problem is that when I do play these games, I play them obsessively- for 12 straight hours and days on end.  I abandon all of my responsibilities- whether it's convenient or not, sit in a chair, and stare at a 21-inch computer monitor.  Then, just as the wave of compulsion washed over me, it washes away and I walk away a few pounds lighter (too.busy.to.eat) and find Mr. Peaches so he remembers me before it's too late.  I am very suddenly no longer interested in Mario, Europa Universalis, or Sim City.  Or in whatever other decade-old game I have suddenly remembered existed.

This week, I remembered that The Sims existed.

The Sims first debuted in 2000, and I remember playing it that year on miss sarah's computer.  Basically, it's a game where you play God, without all of that pesky "free-will" business.  You create and maintain a household and the people who live in it.  You.control.everything.  And anyone who has known me for a second knows that I love control.

All of this is well and good, and I could easily write a few blog posts on how much fun it is to decorate a virtual house that you have built, create the virtual people and the virtual personalities who live in it, and help these virtual people achieve in their careers, and even have little virtual babies if you so choose.  But I'm actually writing to ask you to let me convince you that Electronic Arts, the makers of The Sims, simplified and paralleled real life with astonishing accuracy.

True story.

Part One- Background

Okay, so once you build and furnish your house, your job as God is to keep your Sims (the people) happy.  They have a few basic needs and a status bar for each, so you can prioritize them according to severity.

• Bladder
• Hygiene
• Hunger
• Energy
• Fun
• Social
• Comfort
• Room

These needs are pretty self-explanatory: You need to tell your Sims when to use the bathroom, take a shower, eat, sleep (or drink espresso, as the case may be), and have fun.  The Sims need to make and talk to friends, and if they neglect a friendship over time, this person ceases to remain their friend.  They also don't like to be physically uncomfortable for long periods of time (they need to sit in a comfy chair or take a bath, for example).  "Room" can best be described as a measure of claustrophobia- Sims need natural light, plants, and furnishings/decor they can enjoy.

Part Two to follow- and I promise it's somehow related to Christmas.

Speaking of which, Merry Christmas to you, Dear Reader.  I hope you're having a better day than this kid (who is clearly on to something).

A Wedding and The South

Spring has sprung in Kentucky.

I'm not from Kentucky, nor do I live in Kentucky, but I had the pleasure of traveling to and spending the weekend in Lexington this past weekend and Mr. Peaches and I had a blast.

First, though, I'd like to take this opportunity to say a little something about The South:

As soon as I traveled outside the Cincinnati Metropolitan Area, I could feel my pants tightening.  There is just no denying that they do food better in The South and I think it's the bacon grease and lard in the air that causes the automatic weight gain, even if you're just passing though.

But we didn't just pass through.

In fact, on Saturday, Miss Sarah (one of my oldest and dearest friends) took us to feast at the infamous Ramsey's Diner.  I'd like to say first, that if you are ever, EVER, in Lexington, KY (or within a sixty mile radius) GO EAT THERE.  I ordered the Country Fried Steak, a meal I have not eaten in many moons, and I could only eat HALF.  Mr. Peaches ordered Chicken & Dumplings, which was delicious (but a little less impressive), while Miss Sarah ordered...wait for it....

The Hot Brown

Excuse me? The HOT BROWN?  But there are so many distasteful and unappetizing jokes I can make about that! THE HOT BROWN?  What IS this elusive meal?

Apparently, it's a Kentucky favorite.  You can read more in-depth about it here, but I don't really recommend it.  (Although, Sarah, you'll be happy to know that the mystery "white sauce" is just more cheese.)

(note: This is not Miss Sarah's actual Hot Brown,

though it is from Ramsey's.)

After we stuffed ourselves full, we walked to a local bookstore and perused the shelves until we felt like normal human beings again.  Then?

THEN WE WENT BACK TO RAMSEY'S FOR PIE!

I think this is where mistakes were made.  Miss Sarah, Mr. Peaches, and I each ordered our own slice of homemade pie.  We then proceeded to taste and deliberate over every one else's pie.

Pretty sure I gained three pounds.  Pretty sure they are worth it.  Be careful in Kentucky.

However,  besides spending a lovely, much needed time with Miss Sarah, Mr. Peaches and I also went to the wedding of another close friend of 10+ years. 

Mrs. Young wore a beautiful red dress, a color I once admired for myself should the day ever come, and she looked stunning (and while I am still waiting on more pictures, I'll give you this one for free).

I was excited to see my friend so happy, though, as all good friends should, I offered her a ride far, far away the night before- you know, just in case.

For me and Mr. Peaches, the reception went off without a hitch, despite my nerves about sitting down and having dinner with people I haven't seen in practically ten years.  Mr. Peaches is such a natural at making friends and entertaining people that we had tons of fun.

Now my friend is all sorts of married and off on her honeymoon with her honey.  

Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Young!